This comes from Marietta, Ohio, where workers at a Goodwill store opened an antique metal water jug that had been donated and found several bags of marijuana with a value of $1,500.

Nobody knows if this means the person donating the marijuana will now claim a $1,500 tax deduction, or he's too depressed to think about it. But Marietta officials have since noticed a significant increase in consumption of Doritos, microwave burritos and old couches.

You know, if only the Miami airport police could be brought in to investigate, I'm sure they could clear this whole thing up.

Which leads me to Michael Vick. (See? There's always a transition.)

On Sunday, the remains of the Falcons face the Philadelphia Eagles and their famous backup quarterback. Three months into his return, he's still trying to break into double digits in attempted passes. I'm sure when Vick signed with the Eagles, his first goal was, "I hope I get to play as much as Chris Redman."

Oy. Hopefully this game doesn't turn into "West Side Story." Maybe somebody brings a fake water jug and shares?

The Falcons are missing Matt Ryan, and probably Michael Turner. The Eagles are beat up themselves, but not to that extent. You can hope for a win and a playoff spot. But both are looking like long shots right now. About those pre-season projections. Can we just erase them off the machine?

Eagles cover 5 1/2.

(This is an NFL predictions column only. Look for ACC and SEC predictions Saturday in a special section.)

NFL Snack Pack

Patriots at Dolphins: Bill Belichick sleeps with a light on ever since the New Orleans game. But there's a significant drop-off from Drew Brees to Chad Henne. Patriots cover 5 1/2.

Titans at Colts: I'm not sure where the turnaround from reported suicidal thoughts to five straight wins ranks on the comeback scale. But I'd have to think Vince Young at least qualifies for a George Romero film. (Kids: Google.) Colts cover 6 1/2.

Saints at Redskins: I understand it's tough for a Falcons fan to pull for the Saints. But think about this: Brees (27 TD passes) vs. DeAngelo Hall. Now who are you pulling for? Subplot: New Orleans defensive coordinator Gregg Williams, drop-kicked by Dan Snyder, is kind of motivated. Saints win and cover 9 1/2 (barely).

Cowboys at Giants: The Giants beat Dallas in September, ruining the opening of "Jerry World," although nobody seemed to notice because they all were either staring at go-go dancers, drinking Cristal, buying $37 Keith Brooking bobble-head dolls (it only smack-talks after trades), sitting in on a time-share seminar, complimenting Muffy on her new perfectly matched cosmetic twins (a two-point conversion?) and going blind looking at the video screen. OK. Enough deep analysis. Cowboys cover 2.

Vikings at Cardinals: In the month of November, Brett Favre threw 12 touchdown passes with zero interceptions and had a quarterback rating of 129.4, give or take a bionic arm. But I still wouldn't mind if a real Viking clubbed him over the head. Do they exist in Scottsdale? Didn't think so. Vikings cover 3.

Accounting Dept.

Last week: 8-3 straight up, 5-6 against the line.

Bottom line: 99-43 straight up, 68-74 against the line.

Net profit: Still calculating.